In a crowded field, the award for this year's snobbiest, most elitist Guardian letter may have already been won.

From a Guardian reader in Lancashire, on the retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson:

I have no interest whatsoever in this bloke who tells an overpaid bunch of oiks how to kick a ball about. What if somebody really significant in the creative arts retired? Say Seamus Heaney declared he was retiring from poetry – would we get a supplement about that?

'Oiks'. Charming.